I Regret
by kaustic-kiwi
Summary: edited A sad, angsty fic about how Inuyasha is likely to end. Just wrote it to get my feelings out, it put a weird feeling in my gut when I finished it. Kagome and Inuyasha reflect on their lives now that it is all over...


Kiwi: Hi, again. I should be doing homework, but I decided to edit this so that it was more complete. I wrote it at first around 12:00 at night, so now I'm going to fix it up a bit.

Satrchild009: I know, it was meant to be sad, I'm actually editing because I don't think it expressed the sadness enough. I love Inu/Kag too, hope you like this more as I edited.

Toxic Panda: Cool name! Yeah, I think that was that song that inspired me, that and my own personal experiences.

gossa: I know! T-T

peoplekityo: Hello again. I'm really glad you liked it. I also am going to try to update one or both of my other stories…

I Regret (edited) 

She was crying again, about me. I don't really know how I knew, but I did. And I degraded myself once again for breaking her heart. It had all ended so fast, I never really got to talk to her about us.

I think we both knew what might happen when the jewel was completed, but never did we stop to think what life would be like without each other. When Naraku was finally killed, purified by Kagome, she went home. Sango and Miroku settled down, adopting Shippo who still checks the well sometimes. I stayed in the village, or near it anyway, and tried to live on. But each step I take that leads away, I find myself more lost. I think back everyday, every time we shared seems so unreal.

You never realize how much someone means to you until they are gone. I remember her saying goodbye, every detail. She wanted to give me the jewel, but I wouldn't take it.

"_Don't you want to be a full demon?"_

"…_Not anymore. You showed me that…"_I remember she looked so surprised, but then she smiled.

"_Can I make a wish then?"_

"_Like you need to ask me." _There was a bright light, then the jewel was gone, purified.

"_What did you wish for?"_

"_Please don't be angry… but I wished Kikyo would rest in peace, instead of bringing you down to hell. I didn't want to see that happen to you, and I think she deserved it. Now she can be happy." _I wasn't stupid, I knew my seeing Kikyo had bothered Kagome. All right, so that's an understatement, you get the idea. It was the most unselfish thing I had ever seen, she was continuing to care about me and even what you could call her rival as she was leaving.

"_I think… it's better that way."_

"_Well, I guess then, this is goodbye." _Before I realized what was happening, she hugged me, tightly, like she never wanted to let go. I could smell her trying not to cry, and it broke my heart.

"_I'll miss you, Inuyasha." _I stood there like a fool as she let go and walked toward the well. I had convinced myself that she would be better off in her home, with her family. But it was right then I thought, _Aren't we her family too? _When she reached the side of the old well, she turned around, and I saw her face once last time, a tear falling down from the saddest eyes ever. It hit me, after all this time, I loved her. I loved Kagome, more than anything, she was my world and I was letting her go. I hadn't told her yet.

"_Kagome…" _she didn't hear me, just jumped in as the light began to surround her.

"_KAGOME!" _I charged after her down the well, but I couldn't get through. She was gone.

Now I am left with nothing but memories that pale in comparison. I can't help but think what would have happened if I had told her, and now I realize she loved me too. Why else would she do so much for me, care about me so much? I lost the one thing I ever really cared about, and it was the second time in my life I had cried, the second time I had cried for her. I am alone, and no matter how far I go, I always remember, for the rest of my long life. And what makes it worse is that it is my fault.

It was happening again, I was losing my concentration. The tears weren't helping me either. I needed to study for my college exam, but just like always, Inuyasha found someway to distract me. The water droplets splashing occasionally made the text hard to read. When I had come back home, I had somehow managed to bring all my grades up and even enter a decent college, working so hard that I didn't have time to think about what I had left behind. It was just moments like these, when I really had nothing to do, was about to fall asleep, or any other time my mind was unguarded, he would come waltzing back in, taking a hold of my heart yet again.

I can remember everything about that world, every adventure. There was a time when I had written all of them down, to preserve something so precious. For my last birthday, Grandpa had even found me an ancient text written by none other than Miroku himself, describing everything. But after "the mysterious priestess from another world" went back home, that was it. There was some story about Miroku, Sango and Shippo and I was glad that they were happy, but nothing of Inuyasha. I wonder what happened to him, if he was mad at me or even if missed me at all.

"Ugh! I can't be doing this! Not now," I pushed myself away from my desk in my dorm that I had all to myself. I went to the window to look at the stars. They were so dim here, in fact, everything here in my world seemed so lifeless compared to the past. It seemed cloudy, but then again it always did to me. Ever since I had said goodbye to him.

"_Well, I guess then, this is goodbye."_ I had hugged him, and how I wish I had never let go. But I had to, he didn't love me, right? So I let go.

"_I'll miss you, Inuyasha." _That was it. That was all I said before turning around and heading toward the well. But just as I was about to jump in, my heart bested my pride and I looked back at him. He seemed so lost, like he was losing something important. There was this look in his eyes, I almost couldn't go anymore. _What if…_ I wanted to cry and tell him how I felt, but my throat was dry. A single tear managed to escape as I turned back around and left him, I swear I could almost hear him calling me.

When I got home, I knew I couldn't go back, so I collapsed in the well and sobbed. I never told him, and now I was going to be alone forever. It was all over.

"_I'll miss you, Inuyasha." _That was all I said. When I look back now, I realize what a fool I had been. Now he's all I can think about.

The rain begins to fall now, sweet and pure, and at first I think my window is open. Then I realize I am crying for him again, for everything we lost because of our foolishness, our pride. Each tear is a memory, each tear a little piece of my heart for him.

I loved him, with all my heart, but I never told him. I'm doomed forever to think about what could have been, until I die and maybe see him again then, may God have mercy. But until then, I know I will always and forever miss him.

And oh, how I regret.

Kiwi: So yeah, I just wanted to add a little to Kagome's part, make her sadness seem more real. Now I will attempt to update something else, see you later everyone. Just a note, this did, in it's own way, have a moral to it. Don't let them go, because you will regret.


End file.
